(CORRECTION) Mike's Midterm Tsunami Truth #4

Introducing The Whackadoodle 10

(Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images)

(A daily series to counter the reporting that the Republicans are going to win the House and Senate. They are not.)

(NOTE: An earlier version of this Tsunami Truth used the word “spermicide” when it should have said “sperm.” I’ve also updated a few more points in case you want to give it a fresh read!)

There are so many ways the Republicans are trying to help the Democrats win in November, it almost takes your breath away. Perhaps they are so cocksure of their own prowess, including their special powers to resurrect Trump in 2024. Or, maybe they feel sorry for the Dems who have often been unable to fight and win for the things they say they believe in. 

Or maybe they’re just nuts. Because why else would you purposely help your opponent win by running the biggest batch of nutters nationwide in American electoral history?

Don’t believe me? Well, my friends, to prove it I have scoured the country to find the biggest whackadoodles on the Republican side of the ballot — those candidates who are so insane, so absolutely bonkers they are handing their Democratic opponents the best early Christmas gift ever.

And, over the next 41 days, I’ll present to you…

The Whackadoodle 10

The ten best examples of why we are going to have a Blue Tsunami on November 8th — starting today with….

10. Matthew DePerno — Republican candidate for Michigan Attorney General

Matt DePerno wants to be Attorney General of Michigan because he believes Plan B, the “morning after” birth control pill, is a form of murder. That’s right. Although what the pill actually does is prevent a sperm from completing its job of fertilizing an egg, DePerno is the first anti-abortion activist I’ve met who believes that “life” doesn’t begin at conception — he insists it begins BEFORE conception and it should be against the law for anyone to interrupt a sperm on its way to do its “job.” For DePerno, potential fertilization is “life” and preventing it should be a crime. I know, right now your head is spinning reading this and you’re thinking, “what’s next — having a period (the loss of what could’ve been a potential baby!) is a felony?”

To make himself even more clear, here’s what DePerno said at the Conservative Political Action Conference in Texas last month:

“You gotta figure out how you ban the pill from the state,” DePerno said. “But you have to stop it at the border. It would be no different than [banning] fentanyl. The state has to ban it, and it should be banned.”

Comparing a safe and legal birth control pill to a deadly synthetic opioid like fentanyl — when synthetic opioids kill over 150 people every day in this country — is a sign of madness. And one more step by a man seeking public office so he can control the reproductive organs of the majority gender. 

But DePerno doesn’t stop there. He’s a class-A bigot and gay-hater. His Democratic opponent, the incumbent Michigan Attorney General, Dana Nessel, is a lesbian. And that, according to DePerno, makes her dangerous and a threat to our children. 

Gay-haters often accuse LGBTQ+ citizens of being on a mission to “groom” young people into “turning gay.” DePerno calls Attorney General Dana Nessel “Michigan’s Groomer General.” In an August tweet attacking Nessel for being a lesbian “groomer,” DePerno also displayed the white supremacist’s symbol of Pepe the Frog.

DePerno is running on the trifecta platform of hate toward women, gays and Black citizens. To help him out, Trump is traveling to Michigan this Saturday to hold a rally for DePerno and other Michigan Republican candidates (all of them election deniers) at Macomb County Community College in suburban Detroit.

And if all of this wasn’t enough, DePerno is also one of the top lawyers in the country who’s been filing one losing lawsuit after another to overturn the 2020 election.

DePerno filed his first lawsuit alleging voter fraud three weeks after the election, laying the blame on the Dominion Voting Systems machines, and asking the judge to allow him to take pictures of the vote tabulators in Antrim County, MI.

Months later, he filed another lawsuit claiming voter machine fraud in Michigan and sent subpoenas to at least 8 county clerks demanding access to their voting equipment, along with ballots, logs, and election tapes. Some of these counties didn’t even use Dominion voting machines.

And now DePerno finds himself under investigation by a special prosecutor in Michigan as to whether he and others, including Rudy Giuliani’s nutcase protégé Sidney Powell, illegally tampered with voting machines.

This insanity and other conspiracy theories have turned the majority of Michiganders against DePerno. And to our good fortune, as luck would have it, in addition to DePerno’s bid in Michigan, 10 out of 30 attorney general races nationwide have a Republican election denier on the ballot! A think tank report also found that election deniers will be on the ballot this Roevember in half of the gubernatorial races, and 44% of the races for secretary of state. 

And in Alabama, Arizona and Michigan – GOP election deniers are running for all three top positions.

Hallelujah and Praise Jesus and all the unfertilized eggs! Thank you Trumpster Republicans for helping us win come November. By putting up candidates whom the majority of Americans find to be repulsive and crazy, you’ve sent them running to vote for the Democrat — or they will just stay home and not vote at all. Your candidates may appeal to your base, but there are millions upon millions more of us than them. And by turning moderate Republicans and independents against you, you’ve made us even bigger. How will we ever repay you? Maybe by (when our side has true power) making sure all of you have great health care, a cleaner environment, a living wage and your children being taught the true history of race and racism in America! 

Think of it as good grooming.

(Stayed tuned in the coming weeks here on my Substack for the other 9 top Republican whackadoodles running for office!)

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